In life, death is inevitable. We don’t like the idea. We don’t want to think about the idea. We don’t want to accept the idea. We would rather focus on something else… maybe anything else… something that doesn’t make us feel so helpless an
d sad and out of control. However, sooner or later we come back to it…In life, death is inevitable.
When death or loss occurs, we respond. We respond in ways that we recognize, and we respond in ways that we may not recognize. You have probably heard that “no two people grieve the same way” or “there is no right way or wrong way to grieve”. These are tried and true statements and there is a reason why they are tried and true, it because…well…they are tried and they are true.
You are individual. You are unique. You are you, and you will respond
to your loss in your own special way. That being said, as you walk this path of loss, you may find that there are a few common landmarks along the way.
Listed below, in no particular order, is a list of some of the different ways that loss can affect you. This is NOT a list of requirements in order to grieve “appropriately”. This is NOT a complete list of the potential ways that loss can touch our lives. It IS a list that is offered to you in order to broaden your awareness of how impactful death can be.
Responses to Death or loss may include:
Restlessness, difficulty concentrating, disrupted sleep patterns, frequent dreams of your loved one, loss of interest in social interaction, altered eating habits, loss of interest in personal appearance, denial of the loss, blaming others for the loss, feeling shaky, increased heartbeat, tightness in the chest or throat.
You could experience:
Anger, Guilt, Frustration, Anxiety, Confusion, Fear, Despair… Relief, Comfort, Peace, and/or Hope.
Cry unexpectedly, Feel you are burden to others, Find yourself wandering aimlessly around the house, Forgetting to finish things you have started, or that you are simply “Going Crazy”.
The list could continue, but hopefully you are beginning to get the idea. When it comes to Death and Loss and your response, it can be a multidimensional experience. The key is it is your experience. Embrace it, lean into it, and allow yourself the privilege to walk this special pathway you now find yourself walking on. If the bereavement staff at Hospice of East Texas can help, please reach out to us.